21 February 2019 @ 12:37 am
here is the deepest secret nobody knows  
Author: fifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org
Title: here is the deepest secret nobody knows
Rating: Explicit
Pairing/s: Merlin/Arthur
Character/s: Arthur, Merlin
Summary: Merlin wanted Arthur to know all of him, and all that he had been through. But Arthur couldn’t, how could he? He hadn’t lived Merlin’s life. He hadn’t waited. And Merlin didn’t know how to express it in words himself.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 581
Prompt: #352 - i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
Author's Notes: Sorry, this drabble is a bit lazy, but I felt the poem itself screamed post-canon Merlin with a newly returned Arthur. The poem Merlin recites is [i carry your heart with me(i carry it in] by e. e. cummings.

Merlin curled up in the bed he had spent countless sleepless nights in, thinking and longing and wanting with all his
      might. He could hardly let himself believe that the heart that thudded beneath his ear was real. That Arthur, his
      golden king had returned to him once more.

Arthur carded a hand through Merlin’s hair and bent to press a kiss to his head. Merlin held him closer and smiled.
      “I carry your heart with me,” he murmured as he traced lines on Arthur’s bare chest. “I carry it in my heart. I
      am never without it.”

He lifted his head and kissed Arthur’s breastbone and directly against that blessed, living, beating heart. “Anywhere
      I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling.”

Making his way down his lover’s body, Merlin smoothed his hands over firm, solid muscle. He let his tongue and lips
      traverse a meandering course over soft, light hair and clenching abs as he continued to speak reverently,
      worshipping his love. “I fear no fate, for you are my fate, my sweet. I want no world...” he said, his voice low,
      “For beautiful you are my world, my true.”

Merlin looked up sharply and glared at Arthur, as he felt his amused eyes on him. Arthur’s face slowly softened, as
      he bent to sitting and their lips met. Merlin slid into his lap and wrapped his arms around Arthur’s neck.

“And it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant, and whatever a sun will always sing is you...” he whispered
      against velvet, red lips.

With a smile, Merlin pushed him back onto the bed and wrapped a hand around Arthur’s ready cock.

“Here is the deepest secret nobody knows,” he continued. Their eyes meet as Merlin shifted on top of him and
      guided Arthur inside of him.

“Here,” he gasped, “is the root of the root…”

Merlin started to move slowly, working himself carefully up and down. “And the bud of the bud…”

With hands wrapped firmly about Merlin’s hips, Arthur flung his head back into the pillow, groaning.

“And…” Merlin bent down to share a kiss and Arthur caressed his side. “The sky of the sky of a tree called life...”

Panting and trembling with his efforts, Merlin knew he was close. He wrapped a hand around his own length, glad
      Arthur was indulging him the thoughts and feelings that overwhelmed his heart. Merlin wanted Arthur to know
      all of him, and all that he had been through. But Arthur couldn’t, how could he? He hadn’t lived Merlin’s life. He
      hadn’t waited. And Merlin didn’t know how to express it in words himself. This poem was the only thing he’d
      ever heard that had come close to showing how he had felt waiting for so long, and how he felt now Arthur was
      back. Merlin desperately wanted Arthur to understand how he felt, about him, about them.

“...which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide,” he gritted out as Arthur batted Merlin’s hand away for his,
      and they moved together faster and faster. “And this…” Merlin cried out, as his orgasm hit, “...is the wonder that's
      keeping the stars apart…”

He collapsed on top of Arthur, their chests both heaving. Arthur’s heart was once again a heavy thud-thud in his
      ear and he traced a shape around Arthur’s heart as he murmured sleepy, “I carry your heart. I carry it in my heart.”

(Plus a bonus scribble that's honestly is just a scribble, not worth writing home about)

archaeologist_d: Merlin and Arthurarchaeologist_d on February 21st, 2019 12:45 am (UTC)
That was lovely. I loved that you used more of the poem than just that one line.
fifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org: NYE!Merthurfifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org on February 22nd, 2019 06:38 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I cheated really because I used the whole thing. But it was so lovely and really spoke to me for these two. I had another idea in mind initially. But this is the one which won out.
ajsrandomajsrandom on February 21st, 2019 01:01 am (UTC)
What an sensual way to express the poem!
fifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org: Thinking!Arthurfifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org on February 22nd, 2019 06:39 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I was happy with the end result. 🙂
angelus2hot: Merlin Merlin/Arthur Pendragon stareangelus2hot on February 24th, 2019 02:08 am (UTC)
Oh my! Very well done indeed!
fifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org: Merlin&Arthurfifty-fifty.dreamwidth.org on February 28th, 2019 01:30 am (UTC)
Thank you so much! Glad you liked it! :)