brunettepet (brunettepet) wrote in camelot_drabble,

Dog Bait

Author: brunettepet
Title: Dog Bait
Rating: G
Pairing/s: None yet
Character/s: Arthur, Merlin, Percy the Newfoundland
Warnings: Ridiculousness
Word Count: 705
Prompt: 163 Picnic in the sun
Author's Notes: Have some more Percy is a Newfoundland 'verse. This bit follows Inspiration and Merlin's Muses which need to be read first

Merlin took a few practice shots of Arthur pulling at Percy’s lead and Percy ignoring the tugging, the jacket holding all his attention. Arthur’s determined, sweaty face was a marked contrast to the dog’s placid denim destruction. Arthur finally gave up and unhooked the lead with a laugh, eyes finding Merlin’s. “It’s like I’m not even here.” Merlin snapped another picture.

“I don’t think he’s going to move until he’s succeeded in murdering it to death,” Merlin observed. “He’s really focused.”

“It makes me wonder what he’ll turn to once he’s done.” Arthur looked disconsolately at his sofa. “Maybe he’ll fall asleep?”

“You wish.” He took a picture of Arthur mournfully petting the leather sofa arm. It looked like he was saying goodbye. Percy paid them no mind. Merlin framed a close up of massive paws pinning the jacket to the hardwoods and another of powerful jaws clamped on a shredded sleeve.

“Is there a balcony you can put him on? Maybe we can sit in the sun with him. Once he’s done with your jacket we can lure him out with the promise of snacks. Do you have any steaks we can wave in front of his nose?”

Arthur laughed, “Surprisingly, Percy is a vegetarian. I’ve got some vegan dog treats that Gwaine left but I tried to get him away from my shoe with one and he much preferred the taste of leather. Yet another reason to be terrified for the sofa.” The sofa got a few more pets before Arthur trailed off toward the kitchen. “Maybe there’s something else in the bag.”

He returned waving what looked to be a rawhide bone. “Look, Percy, here’s a delicious veggie rawhide sweet potato chew! Doesn’t that sound yummier than my clothes?” Arthur wheedled.

“Not really,” Merlin answered for Percy. “It sounds kinda disgusting.” He took a shot of Arthur dangling the treat in front of an obviously unimpressed Percy.

“Shut it, Merlin, let the giant dog get a whiff of this deliciousness so we can lure him out onto the balcony and we can save my furniture for future movie nights and falling asleep on.”

“Sounds like you lead a wild life, mate,” Merlin replied, smiling widely.

“The wildest,” Arthur agreed, returning the smile before biting into the sweet potato chew.

“Oh, gross,” Merlin gagged, snapping another shot of Arthur grimacing and spitting the treat out onto the floor. Percy dropped the jacket and sprang forward swallowing down the pre-chewed snack. “Ugh. Grosser still.” Merlin made retching noises and laughed through a couple more shots.

Arthur threw the rest of the chew to the ground but Percy ignored it. He had dropped the jacket, though, and now wandered toward the kitchen. “He’s like a baby bird,” Merlin chortled. “He wants you to chew his food for him!”

“Yeah, well, he’s out of luck. You were right about those being disgusting. Poor vegetarian dog, I know what he really wants is bacon or a lovely, rare burger. He’s headed to see if I have anything like that in the fridge.”

Merlin’s stomach growled loudly at the thought and he rubbed his hand over it. “Sorry, I haven’t eaten since breakfast.”

Arthur pointed to the discarded chew, “There’s plenty more where that came from.” Merlin kicked the chew at him and took a close up of Arthur’s goofy grin.

“C’mon, I’ll make us some sandwiches and grab some crisps to eat out on the balcony. I bet if we have a picnic, Percy will lumber out and try to sit on one of us.”

“I like everything about this plan except getting sat on. I'm already a walking bruise and I don’t want him to break your camera, too.”

“Both good points but it’s not like Percy will listen to me.”

Merlin opened the refrigerator and looked around before pulling something out and flourishing it at Arthur. “Here, rub some bacon behind your ears. I bet that would work,” he said with a wide grin.

Arthur laughed, “Yeah, I bet it would but that’s not a bet I’m willing to place my life on the line for. We’ll just have to roll the dice with ham and cheese sandwiches as bait.”

Merlin’s stomach grumbled in anticipation.
Tags: *c:brunettepet, c:arthur, c:merlin, pt 163:picnic in the sun, rating:g, type:drabble

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