Fitz (fractionallyfox) wrote in camelot_drabble,

What Am I So Afraid Of?

Author: fractionallyfox
Title: What Am I So Afraid Of?
Rating: PG
Pairing/s: Gwaine/Leon
Character/s: Gwaine, Leon
Summary: Three days has given Gwaine a lot of time to think about how he feels.
Warnings: Vague mention of battle injury
Word Count: 664
Prompt: #213: Eye Contact
Author's Notes: I'm very sorry for this being so late. I had a lot of trouble with this one.

It was rare for Gwaine to be awake before Leon.

The sunlight coming in through the window and falling across the room had grown in length, color, and warmth since Gwaine woke up. If he had to guess, he would say it was mid-morning, still a few hours before midday but definitely past the morning meal, evidenced by the tray of food Leon's squire had brought in. The boy had been quick and quiet; Gwaine almost didn't notice him until he was slipping out the door. The food on the table and the bowl of water and fresh bandages were the only evidence that he'd been there at all.

Gwaine reached out beneath the bed covers, watching Leon sleep as he edged his hand closer to Leon's injured side. The patrol had been ambushed, nothing a handful of knights couldn't handle, but the report Percival gave in Leon's stead also included a sorcerer among the bandits. In the confusion Leon had taken a bad blow to his side; Gaius said magic was the reason the sword had pierced so easily through armor. It took three days before Gaius allowed Leon to return to his rooms, three days and three nights of Gwaine not sleeping in the hallway just outside Gaius' door.

He had some suspicion Merlin had slipped him a sleeping draught too.

A full night's sleep had given him perspective though and Gwaine knew that he was being given a chance. While the fear of losing Leon had dominated his thoughts over the last three days, he had also felt a sharp stab of regret knowing that Leon could die without ever knowing how Gwaine felt. They'd alluded to it - there was no shortage of caring words between them - but Gwaine knew now that Leon deserved it all.

Their lives were constantly in danger and Gwaine's fear of losing Leon before he knew was greater than how much he feared opening up.

This was his chance.

He made no effort to wake Leon, who needed more rest than he would likely allow himself, but nonetheless Leon stirred not too long after the growing sunlight hit the foot of the bed. Leon stretched and then groaned, the movement pulling at his injured side. He curled into a position that Gwaine guessed was least painful and yawned before slowly opening his eyes.

Leon smiled as he saw Gwaine, an expression so soft and warm that Gwaine couldn't stop himself from pushing forward to kiss him.

This was his chance.


Gwaine laughed, the sound breathy with relief. "Morning yourself. How do you feel?"

"I've been better," Leon said with a slight grimace. "But I've had worse."

"It's not a competition, Leon. Isn't that what you're always telling me?"

"I'm surprised you were listening. Were you worried?"


Leon looked surprised by Gwaine's quiet answer but he didn't say anything, waiting for the continuation they both knew Gwaine was preparing. Gwaine met Leon's gaze, seeing only patience and affection looking back at him.

This was his chance.

"If you died, Arthur would choose Elyan to take over your position and I'd never hear the end of it."

Leon laughed, his light chuckle turning into a groan that distracted him from the disappointment Gwaine felt with himself. He shook it off quickly when Leon grabbed his side, throwing back the bed covers to get a better look. The bandages were still clean and Leon seemed all right so Gwaine let himself be pulled back down next to Leon.

"I'm glad I could spare you that inconvenience," Leon said, his smile wry but warm.

Gwaine rolled his eyes and leaned in to kiss Leon's laughter, gently wrapping his arm around Leon as Leon pulled him in closer. They lingered in the simple pleasure of life until their hungers became too much to ignore. All the while Gwaine thought about the words he'd failed to say.

Perhaps tomorrow.

It was rare for Gwaine to need more than three chances.
Tags: *c:fractionallyfox, c:gwaine, c:leon, p:gwaine/leon, pt 213:eye contact, rating:pg, type:drabble

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