Endora (sidhe_faerie) wrote in camelot_drabble,
Endora
sidhe_faerie
camelot_drabble

ADVICE ON ‘YA KNOW’

Author: sidhe_faerie
Title: ADVICE ON ‘YA KNOW’
Rating: R
Pairing/s: Arthur/Gwen, mentions of Merlin/Morgana
Character/s: Merlin, Gwaine, Leon, mentions of Morgana, Percival and Elyan
Summary: Arthur seeks the advice of his mates on how to pay Gwen back for “the air conditioner incident.”
Warnings: Sexual innuendo and suggestions.
Word Count: 632
Prompt: prompt 12: tease
Author's Notes: I just saw this happening. It's just a bit of smutty crack.
This is a continuation of SOME LIKE IT HOT (prompt 11: temptation)



After ‘the air conditioner incident” Arthur was determined to get back at Gwen for the torture she put him through. Well it really wasn’t torture in the end but he’s only a man after all. He can only take so much.


He racked his brain but couldn’t think of a thing to do to even with her. So he decided to get help. He decided to ask his mates.


There was s football match being shown at a local pub and Arthur thought that would be the perfect place to ask for advice.


“Wait she did what?” Leon gave him a look.


“She switched the electric off to the air conditioner.” Arthur said.  


“She did all that just to get you to …. ya  know …. with her?” Merlin laughed.


“Yes. Now I need some way to get back at her for it.” Arthur said. “Merlin, the word is sex.”


Merlin burst out laughing.


“No more ale for him.” Gwaine shook his head. “Have you tried walking around the flat naked?”


“He wants to seduce her not scare her.” Leon said. “You need to get food and feed it to her.”


“Did I not mention the strawberries?” Arthur said.


“What gets me is it took strawberries and ice cubes. What are you made of stone?” Gwaine reached over and gave Arthur’s arm a punch.


“I admit I didn’t get what she was doing at first.” Arthur said.


“Arthur, if I had a wife that looked like yours I wouldn’t need a thing.” Gwaine said as he waved the server over for another round. “Too words: bikini top.”


“I’m not going to wear a bikini top.” Arthur looked into the empty bottle of ale and put it on the table.


Merlin laughed. “No dollop head, he was talking about Gwen in a bikini top. Give her a massage. It works for Morgana.”


“I do not want to hear what ‘works’ for my sister, Merlin.” Arthur glared at him. “What she sees in you, I don’t understand.”


“She gets to be on top.” Gwaine laughed.


Merlin blushed and nodded.


Arthur rubbed his face with his hand and sighed. He was doomed.


Leon looked thoughtful for a moment. “What about a picnic?”


“That’s too public.” Arthur shook his head


“No with candles on the floor and then you won’t have to go far to go for ‘desert’ if you know what I mean.” Leon grinned.


“It’s a shame Percival had to work. He’s very romantic.” Merlin said.


“How would you know Merlin?” Arthur asked.


“Morgana told me.” Merlin grinned.


“And how would she know?”


“Arthur, your sister is well … friendly.” Gwaine laughed. “Very friendly.”


“Please tell me you all haven’t … ya know … with my sister.” Arthur said although he had a feeling he knew the answer.


“Arthur, the word is sex.” Merlin laughed. “And I think we all have at some point.”


“Not Elyan. He turned her down. He said Gwen would have killed him.” Leon pointed out.


“I shall try to remember to thank him. Do you have any ideas that I can actually use?” Arthur said with an annoyed tone.


“Clean the flat in an apron.” Merlin suggested.


“How will that entice her?” Arthur asked.


“Just an apron, Arthur.” Merlin smiled.


“Why don’t you just beg like the rest of us?” Leon said.


They all look at Leon.       


“Beg for what?” A voice asked from behind Arthur.


Almost in unison they turned to find Gwen looking at them with a curious look.


Merlin Leon and Gwaine burst out laughing.


“Tell her Arthur.” Merlin said.


“Yeah mate.” Gwaine said.


“Go ahead.” Leon said.


“I think the word you’re looking for is ….” Merlin started to say.


“Shut up Merlin!”  Arthur growled.


“Arthur, are you going to tell me?” Gwen asked.


“No.” 



Tags: *c:sidhe_faerie, pt 012:tease
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